Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Passive-aggressive notes, ShallowGal style

On our Baycation, Noa and Jake fought. A lot.

Here's the thing. Honestly, I don't care if they fight so long as they don't touch each other and I don't have to listen to it. And this fight broke rule #2.

After several warnings, I sat them down to impose my new favorite consequence for making me listen to loud children : writing each other an apology note.

Jake, being the typical first child, sat down and wrote his note:

I wish I could blame the camera, but Jake's handwriting actually is this blurry.

Translation: Dear Noa, I'm sorry I used bad manners to you and I will use better manners in the future and hope you'll forgive me and I'm very sorry I pushed you. (1) It was wrong to do and I'll use better manners. I'm also very sorry I got you into trouble too. Love, Jake.

Fine. Jake is released and goes into the next room to watch television with his friends.

Now Noa HATES to write. It's actually a little upsetting to me, since writing is one of my all-time favorite pastimes. But it does make for a good punishment for her. Maybe.

This exercise in apparent child abuse brought to you by Hyatt

Dear Jake: I'm sorry for doing nothing, Noa. PS: I did not touch you :(

Nobody will ever accuse me of being the Queen of follow-thru, but there is no way I am going to accept this. Noa points out that there is no more hotel stationary and I counter by showing her that the back of her note is blank. Back to the desk Noa heads.

The instructions were to write a full page note.
Noa took advantage of the fact that the hotel stationary was unlined.

Translation: Dear tattle tail, I'm sorry. I won't do it again. Noa
This now poses a dilemma for SG: should she submit it to Passive aggressive or save it for her own blog? Noa takes advantage of SG's confusion and escapes to watch tv. The end.

1) So in writing this note Jake also admitted to breaking rule #1, but at this point, I have bigger fish to fry. Well, I guess technically a littler fish. But a little, mean fish, like those miniature sharks. Or an electric eel.


TMCPhoto said...

I'd laugh but I know that once my daughter is old enough to write I will be receiving notes just like this when this form of punishment is implemented.

MommyTime said...

I know I shouldn't laugh because this will be me as soon as my children are old enough to write by themselves. But I can't help giggling. Her notes are hilarious. And you should ALSO submit them to P-A notes. They'll love them too.

country mouse said...

Noa's sense of fairness is hysterical : )

What I love about Jake's note is that you can't really tell whether he was 100% sincre (in which case, good for him!) or whether he was writing what he knew you wanted him to write but later did something sabbotagical (yes, it's a word!) like leave a big hunk of chewed gum on her pillow case.

Joanna said...

YES! You absolutely MUST submit this to Passive Aggressive...this is absolutely fabulous and jus the thing they love. And it show's that you're a great mum..bonus!

Jen said...

Love it!! I wish my kids were that entertaining.

Philly said...

Too funny!!

Anonymous said...

This is hilarious!
Well, maybe not for you, but to me it is.
And I am sure my turn will come some day.

the mama bird diaries said...

This post is hilarious. I love the idea of writing apology notes.

Sue @ My Party of 6 said...

I love that idea, but am a little fearful of what my kids would write. Although it would make great dinner conversation in about 20 years when they have their own kids and I pull the letters out again. Hmmm....

Anonymous said...

I love it! I'm like you - fight if you must, but don't hit and don't involve me. Next time, I'm going to make them write apology notes, just to see what I get!


parentingBYdummies said...

Can't wait till mine can write b/c this is an awesome punishment, I mean solution. My #2 will probably be a bit like yours b/c when I require him to verbally apologize to his older bro he usually ends it with "Poo poo." As in, "I'm sorry I kicked you...Poo poo," or "I'm sorry I didn't share with you... Poo poo." It sorta loses it's value that way, huh?!

Marinka said...

So while all this note writing is going on, I'm picturing your yongest son holding some people hostage or stealing the silver.

I love the notes.

David said...

I'd keep an eye out for Noa. She is a wiley one.

I'm Julie said...

Noa is my kind of girl.

As I like to apologize, "I'm sorry you're so uptight. Jackass."

Hilarious! You're an awesome mom.

Stimey said...

I'm the queen of the "I'm sorry you felt bad about that" apology for my husband. I admire Noa's prowess at such an early age.