Monday, November 16, 2009

Top 10 reasons why ShallowGal isn't participating in NaMamPoBo

10: I don't know what it means. Give me a minute, let me google up some excuses.
9: Aha. Cause there's no such thing. Very sneaky sis.
8: There's NaNoWriMo which involves writing a whole novel in one month. ShallowGal can't read an entire novel in a month. And SG's only word processing program is text edit (1) which is the computer equivalent of sticky notes. Although, like footnotes on a blog, the kitsch factor of writing a novel on sticky notes allows one to get away with less plot.
7: Then there's NaBloPoMo where you blog everyday for a month. November has 30 days. You do the math. (3)
6: But not only have I not been writing my blog, I haven't been reading yours either. So we're even. You're welcome.
5: This is the worst list ever. No wonder it took like 3 weeks to write. And David Letterman hasn't called.
4: Part of the blog silence is that SG is concerned that she might run out of topics. Given that her draft folder is filled with half-written essays with titles like "adventures in generic tampons" you should be concerned too.
3: Very concerned.
2: Because this came in the mail today:

Along with a note demanding $6.95 or I'll never see another recipe for Quick bologna quesadillas.

And the number 1 reason why SG isn't participating in NaMamPoBo: She went on a girls trip to Chicago; she's completely hooked on new Fall television like V, FlashForward and of course Real Housewives of the OC; these short days really take a toll on her mood ; she's taking her family to Mexico and has to clean the house for the dog-sitter.

1) SG also doesn't have any ink in her printer. It's like the shoemaker's kids going barefoot. (2)
2) Cause I'm married to a printer cartridge salesman. Get it? Although it's time to come clean, he's technically the International Vice President of Printer cartridges. But I still don't have any fucking ink, so who cares?
3) What do you mean, what math? 30 days times 1 post a day = 30 posts.


vuboq said...

You got a dog?

Marinka said...

You clean the house?

ShallowGal said...

V~ How did you not see my Doberman at my house? He's kind of hard to miss.

M~ You're so literal.

vuboq said...

@shallowgal: I was drunk?

David said...

I think your doberman was my favorite part of my visit to your house.

And I want that cake.

The Zadge said...

Oh thank gawd you're back. And tricky footnotes in this one!

heather said...

Girls trips, chicago and the real housewives are reasons enough to ignore blogging in my book...esp. cause the OC gals are back!

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

National Mamby Pomamby Boombox month? What would be so hard about that?

country mouse said...

I am totally out of printer ink too! I think I'll blame your husband. It's easier than doing anything about it myself : )

I can't print the recipe that one of my kids wants me to make. Meh. It's just a kid. They need to embrace the idea that mom doesn't really want to cook.

And I can't print out the 5K training schedule I was going to start two weeks ago. But it's okay because training for a 5K sounds like a lot of work. And honestly? I'm not real worky.

marathon mom said...

Kraft oughtta be sending you a cease and decease pretty quick about the food and fam. You can blog about that.

What is that white blob in the middle of that ufo? miconazole is my guess.