Friday, September 5, 2008

A Very Shallow Recipe Review

ShallowGal was perusing today's mail and came across a cooking magazine called Kraft food and family (1). Since this is a publication that usually features recipes like Quick Bologna Quesadilla, SG rarely pays much attention. But that Stand Up to Cancer special on all three channels tonight? Way depressing.

Anyway this issue featured an article on 'choosy eaters'. This is apparently the new PC term for picky eaters.(2) Now SG is blessed in that her kids will eat pretty much anything that doesn't eat them first. But just for shits and giggles, let's see what Kraft has in mind.

Pizza snacks. That's cool. The posse likes pizza.

Ready? First we gather all the ingredients. 24 Ritz crackers, 1/2 cup ketchup, 1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese and a teaspoon of Italian seasoning.

Wait, what?

Yes. The fine folks at Kraft suggest that we put ketchup and cheese on a ritz cracker and then nuke the whole thing for 15 seconds. Because while a choosy eater might object to cold ketchup on a cracker, lukewarm ketchup is an entirely different story. Then we sprinkle some strange green speckled stuff on top. And voila!


Gross and devoid of any nutritional value. Maybe Kraft is on to something.

1) Let SG make one thing clear; Kraft provided no compensation for this recipe review. Kraft has no interest as SG as a blogger. This was made abundantly clear when Kraft addressed this magazine to 'current resident'.
2)The union on six year olds who don't like green vegetables is super organized.

11 comments:

Salli said...

Yuck! That's just gross.

Teri said...

SG,

Please let Thing 2 know that my children will now be known as "choosy." This may save her much concern and heartache at our next group lunch.

NJaM

Marinka said...

That is so revolting, I'm going to use it as an appetite suppressant. Thanks!

countrymouse said...

No way! They totally ripped that recipe off from "That 70's Show"! Hyde's mother abandoned him and he was fending for himself. His version was a little more ghetto, but still . . .

Kraft had better be sending some fat royalty checks to bad-boy-cute Danny Masterson.

Stimey said...

Oh, that is horrible. Are they subscribing to the Reagan-era "Ketchup As Vegetable" theory? And if there's green Italian seasoning on it (which would cause my kids to run for their lives, btw), then it's, like, extra healthy. Way to go, Kraft.

I'm Julie said...

Oh that is just disgusting!

BACK IN THE DAY, and I'm not pointing any fingers, Moms who were on Weight Watchers used to boil spagetti squash, top it with ketchup, and feed it to the family. They would insist that it was really, REAL spagetti. They even used that little sprinkle of Italian seasoning, just to be sassy. Mind you, this was squash, not actually pasta, and I can't imagine why they thought the ketchup was so much more nutritious than plain tomato sauce.

Back in the day, the bratty daughters (again, not pointing fingers) would refuse to eat it until they were sent to their rooms. Then they snuck downstairs after bedtime for a bowl of cereal.

Molto Benne!

Anonymous said...

Pardon me while I go vomit....

T from PA

Emilita said...

Wow, that's disgusting.

Sherry said...

That's nasty.
Really and truly nasty.

Cindy said...

Wait, I don't understand! How is the choosy eater supposed to separate the cheese from the Ritz cracker after it's been microwaved? And how is she (no names of course) supposed to scrape off the yucky ketchup and the green things? This recipe is too complicated for me.

texasholly said...

Kraft addresses me that way too. And after all the macaroni and cheese I buy? I should sue.