Friday, June 6, 2008

Guest blogger: ShallowGal's Mother

June 6, 2008

Dear Internet:

Please excuse ShallowGal from writing her blog these past few days. She's been unbelievably busy throwing an end of the year Luau for 48 first graders and packing for her Alaska trip. Please don't dock her pay.

What? She doesn't get paid for this? Huh. What about benefits? Really?

Anyway, just when ShallowGal thought that things couldn't get any more hectic, this storm blew through Northern Virginia. It was half hurricane and half tornado with some hail and possibly even a solar flare thrown in. And after it was over ShallowGal had no electricity and her children were all being sheltered in place at their schools.

Leaving her with nothing to do but sit on her front porch and drink the red wine before it spoiled and survey the wreckage.

This tree is a stand-in, being as all ShallowGal's trees already fell
for no reason whatsoever.

Luckily last week was Hurricane Preparedness Week and all flashlights, batteries and bottled water were on sale and tax free at Target. And by luckily, of course I mean totally inconsequentially because, please. ShallowGal walked into Target, saw the sign but then got distracted by the bright lights and pretty colors. And I think we've already established that her existing emergency kit covers little more than an international oatmeal shortage.

Fact: The more one spends on flashlights and dry ice, the faster the electricity will come back. ShallowGal spent about $50 so the power was back on within twelve hours. Not even enough time to rationalize eating all the ice cream before it melted.

Anyway, please don't lower her grade, it wasn't her fault. What? For real?

So what you're telling me here is that ShallowGal spends hours a day writing to exercise her "creativity" and hopefully amuse a few dozen readers. (1) And all she asks is that you not forget about her while she's in Alaska? (2) You can do that, right? Excellent. She'll sleep better tonight knowing that.

Barring any additional acts of God, ShallowGal will return from Alaska on June 17th.

1) Most of whom arrive here accidentally while searching for a review of the croc cyprus or Wildfire restaurant.

2) Or rob her house, but the dog sitter is a big guy and there's nothing worth stealing there anyway.


vuboq said...

Hm. It only takes me about 30 minutes to rationalize eating all the ice cream. My power didn't go out, but I ate all the ice cream anyway. Is that so wrong?

Have fun in Alaska!!! *smooches*

countrymouse said...

Have a wondeful trip! And did you ever get suitable shoes????? (Of course by suitable, I do mean cuter than cute : )

The Jet Set Girls said...

Miss you, ShallowGal, come back soon!