Now that I've blown all my excuses in one wad, I'm going to share with you the conversation I had with Noa today after school. Which is basically the exact same conversation that we have every fucking day. Ironically about what Noa ate right after lunch. Does anyone care about that?
Three kids times three meals + 2 snacks a day times seven days. I told you. It was for your own good.
Noa: I'm Starving. Can I have a snack?
SG: "No, you can't. (2) Fine. This once. What would you like? "
What do we have ?
"We have the same things we always have. How about some fruit?"
"You sure? I have those oranges you like, or maybe some blueberries." (3)
What else is there?
Yogurt. Cheese. Turkey. Oatmeal. (4)
Are there any pop tarts?
Have there ever been any pop tarts?
Yes ! That one time on vacation.
Well that was a one time only thing.
Is there cereal?
I don't know. Go look in the pantry.
Never mind, I'm not hungry.
1) It should be appended to say "unless your name is VUBOQ" because he makes really cool lunches.
2) I make the same "joke" every single time, so I'm not exactly blameless in this debacle.
3) SG is both a fruit whore, spending easily $50 a pop at the produce department and a fruit pimp. There was a well thought out fruit prostition joke there at one point and I'm leaving the footnote open in case it pops back into my brain.
4) It's not that I don't buy junk food, it's just PCSguy and I hoard it for ourselves.