Wednesday, March 18, 2009

How babies are born according to my 4 year old (1)

Eli's teacher, his beloved Miss Judy, had a baby this week. Being the saint that all preschool teachers are, she worked up until the very last minute, ten full days past her due date. Eli had many questions, not the least of which was "how will that ginormous baby get out of Miss Judy?"(2)

I once read that you should first ask what they think and work from there. Eli provided the following information:

  • The baby will come out of Miss Judy's ear.
  • Eli has 2 dogs in his belly which will also come out his ear.
  • The plan is to keep one of these dogs and trade the other one in for an actual baby.
  • Boys cannot have babies which is why he needs to gestate a extra dog to use for trade.
Close enough. I smiled and told him he was correct on all counts.

Miss Judy, having significantly more experience with four year olds, simply answered that the doctor would help the baby get out. Eli shot me an annoyed look and nodded wisely.

With any luck he will remember that all future questions on the topic should be addressed to Miss Judy.

1) These quirky things were way cuter when he was 3. Right?
2) My friend Pia explained the basics to her kids when they were 5 and 7. Her daughter was appalled. "You did that with daddy?" she whined. "Duh," replied her brother "Twice."

13 comments:

MommyTime said...

This post is awesome. My answer, too, has been that "the doctor helps." So far, that has satisfied my 5 yr old (the 3 yr old couldn't care less). I assume at some point I'll have to be more specific, but I don't think 5yo is ready for anything close to the truth yet. I do love the idea of asking him, which I'm sure would produce an answer in the realm of gestating puppies. Great idea! Thanks.

dizzblnd said...

I love kids and their innocence! It is always so funny to hear what they think

Missy said...

OMG I am laughing so hard right now, trying not to wake my snoring husband. That was great.

Missy

CJG said...

We're finally getting a dog!??!!! Aweseome!

CJG said...

We're finally getting a dog!??!!! Awesome!

Kari said...

OMG!!! That is freaking hilarious! I'm dying over here...

Kirsten said...

LOL funny. What did we do for entertainment before we had kids?

David said...

Wait a minute. That's NOT how it works???

the mama bird diaries said...

I never know what to say to my 4 year old about sex or death.

Stimey said...

That is some good stuff right there. You are going to be able to use that to your advantage when he's 15.

countrymouse said...

I never knew what, how or when to tell my kids either. Which might explain how my daughter and her fiancee ended up accidentally expecting a baby last year. I wonder if she knows yet how that happened . . .

Sue @ My Party of 6 said...

I wonder if Miss Judy is willing to come back in 8 years or so to provide chapter 2?

And I'm thinking that a baby coming out your ear might actually hurt worse than where they really come out. (Your butt, according to my kids.)

BOSSY said...

If only these delivery methods were true...