Saturday, November 17, 2007


You know how when you're playing Yahtzee and you get some sucky dice roll and it doesn't fit into any unused scoring category so you place a zero in one of the remaining categories? (1) This may look like another parenting issue but really it's my entry for Best Asian Blog. I wasn't a leading contender there anyway.

We were at a party last Saturday when the conversation turned to the recall of AquaDots because the plastic contains something similar to rohypnol. Nobody else could get this latest toy-of-death of their house fast enough. I commented how much money I'd save on benedryl.

OK. Maybe that came a little closer to crossing the line than I usually get out loud. Anyone who knows me, knows I would never *actually* aquadot my kids. I mean where would one find the dosage? (Crap I did it again) (2)

Fact: None of my kids slept thru the night before 18 months old. Noa was probably closer to three. When I wake that child up for school at 7 am by yanking the covers off and yelling "Payback's a bitch!" well, I won't lie, it feels pretty good.

Sleep is easily the rarest commodity in this house. (3) That's why when PCS-guy bet me I couldn't stay out of the malls until after Christmas, and let me choose my own reward I picked sleep. And when offered anything he wanted should he win (which he will not) he also choose sleep. (4)

So don't call me on December 26th. I'll be sleeping until noon.

On a completely related note (and do not expect that to happen again anytime soon!) tomorrow I plan to start a three part shopping guide for everyone on your list. Completely on-line of course.

(1) Like you aren't home playing Yahtzee on Saturday night too.
(2) Seriously, I'm so crunchy that I annoy myself. I have never drugged my kids to get them to sleep, even on long car trips or for daylight savings.
(3) The most common being the free crayons that come with kids meals.
(4) 15 years together is apparently the statue of limitations on winning sexual favors.

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